My life has changed drastically. I forget my past, and dwell on the future. Sometimes I do stop and enjoy the now, but the stress of the future is just so heavy on my thoughts and my actions. I look at old pictures of me, looking young and charismatic. Radiating with youth. Now I’m young but without youngness. I wish I could be as exuberant as I once was. Cocky and brilliant, looking for laughs, not for attention but for the sake of laughter. I did what I wanted with my friends and made diehard memories. I did drugs, drank, screamed, fucked, lived. I now have a son and family but that isn’t a broken knee. I will become fit again, I will have fun, I will enjoy my youth, and I will do it with my son, my fiance, and my friends. I miss you so much. My friends. I miss you Giovanni, Rhodes, Itzel, Katrina, Evan, Tyler, Treavor, Sam, Luna. All of you mother fuckers, and the ones I failed to mention. Yall were my youth. My life. I’m sorry I’m growing up without most of you, but yall will catch up and hopefully no matter where yall go we will still meet, and enjoy each others company, each others jokes, and stories. I love all of you people who have blessed my life with sunshine. This sounds like an old man writing, but now I feel old. Tomorrow I will strive to feel young. Much love.